There was a past time in which my camera bag was always in my car ready to go. The camera was never in its case, so frequently in my hand. The batteries were so often charged, drained, and recharged that I would have one in the camera and one actively charging in the wall of a gym or side of a pump house or concession stand. Photography was once where I could tune out the chaos of life and tune into the chaos of sports.
Daily - often multiple times a day - you could find me standing on the edge of the field, squatting just off the court, or contorting my body around the fence of a dugout; tracking motion through a viewfinder, freezing instantaneous moments of a game before they passed.
But I won’t lie, it’s been a couple of years. My camera has sat idle in its case, tucked on my closet shelf, constantly pushed and moved to get to other items. The batteries have long died, the SD cards storing photos from forgotten projects and old trips, and the lenscaps are nowhere to be found.
Sometimes life has a way of asking for your full attention, and for a couple of years, mine was drawn elsewhere. In the time that I have stepped away from photography, honestly, a lot has happened. In the span of 5 years:
- I graduated from UConn (Go Huskies!)
- We moved across the country from CT to FL and left behind family, friends, and New England (the only home we ever knew)
- I started my full time career in engineering
- We got engaged
- We got married
- We bought a house and immediately began what seems to be a never ending list of to-do projects
- I began a Master’s degree in mechanical engineering and later stepped away from it
- I supported my husband while he worked his full-time job and finished his bachelor’s degree, and now support him as he works to complete his master’s program
It was and is a full, meaningful chapter, busy and challenging in only the best of ways. But, it was a chapter in which time became a rare resource, and free time went into maintaining relationships and spending time with each other. Creativity had to wait its turn and took a backseat. My focus shifted from photography to building a life, laying foundations and showing up for the people that I love.
In all that was going on, in the occasional quiet moments between responsibilities, I started to miss photography. I missed the hustle of running between different events. Jumping from one game into the next in the matter of a 15 minute car ride. I missed the early morning games where dew (or frost) coated the field, and the night games under the fluorescent stadium lights. I missed being on the sidelines, where you could feel the energy of the crowd and the emotions of the players. I missed meeting people, hearing their stories, and capturing them at some of their highest moments. I missed the feeling of being present in the action while being able to quietly watch on the sidelines.
Now, I find that our life has found a steadier rhythm. Our schedules are still busy but are no longer so overwhelmingly booked. And in this new found time, I have decided to refocus on the passion that I had temporarily set down.
This return is not about chasing the perfect shots, nor am I expecting that I pick up right where I left off. But like anything I do, I am trying to put my best effort forward - while still balancing everything else, of course.
This return is about rediscovering an art that gave me joy. It is a passion that I have neglected - justifiably, but also long enough. It is about feeding the parts of myself that thrive on creativity, connection and community.
Photography has the ability to challenge and excite me while still providing a sense of comfort.
With all that being said, I am so excited to be getting back out there, camera in hand.
